Finding a pub that sells 40s is kind of like finding Jesus.
Sunday, February 04, 2007
Monday, September 06, 2004
Tubing
[I'm going to conviently ignore the fact that I haven't posted in a month. -W.]
The first tubing trip of the year was yesterday. Every year, my fraternity takes a few trips to the Wayne's World tubing place on the Bogue Chitto river. We load up ourselves, some food, and 2 kegs on tubes and float down the river for a relaxing 4-5 hours of drunkeness.
Some notable events on the trip:
-Rob put sunscreen in a smiley face on his chest Billy Madison style. Hilarity ensued, picture to follow.
-When we stopped for food, the peanut butter and the jelly were separated onto 2 different beaches. As neither group was willing to travel to the other, one group had peanut butter sandwiches while the other had jelly sandwiches. I, being allergic to peanut butter, had beer.
-When we stopped next at the infamous rope swing, I kinda got trapped in the middle of another group of people. These people just happened to be prime examples of Louisiana trailer trash, and anyone who knows me knows that I hate trashy people. In the midst of being trashy, one of the sluts with them pushed my tube (and my head) into the river bank, covering me with mud. I kicked her tube back with my foot so that I could get out of the bank, and she went apeshit. I'm not sure of most of what she said, as I don't speak trailer/ebonics, but I got the idea she was pissed at me for kicking her. I politely explained that had she been paying attention she wouldn't have needed to get kicked. This made her even more mad, and I took this chance to make my exit back to among my own friends.
I had a kick ass time, but looking back at it, I probably shouldn't have gone. You see, I woke up yesterday feeling kinda crappy, but not too bad. However, due I assume to tubing, I woke up today sick as a mother fucker. My throat hurts so bad I can barely swallow and I have to blow my nose every 10 seconds. Ah, the sacrifices college students make to have fun.
LSU only won by one point, even though Oregon St. missed THREE (3) extra points. Seriously Pat, LSU is going to be good this year.
Tulane lost to MSU 28-7...our quarterback is worthless. Our young, untested DL, on the other hand, looked pretty spectacular until the second half.
I need to work on LSAT shit today, but I'm too out of it to do anything. Oh well.
Wicker Park is quite possibly the worst movie of all time. I spent the entire movie waiting for something to happen. Do not let the trailer fool you, there is nothing thrilling or dangerous about Wicker Park. About halfway through, the entire theater just started cracking jokes at the screen. Normally, this would piss me off, but considering the circumstances I may have been the one to start the jokes, haha. Anyways, it's bad.
Ken 'HARD' Jennings returns to Jeopardy today. I predict that he remains champion for the enitre season, rendering the yearly 'Tournament of Champions' obsolete, as he will be the sole champion. H.A.R.D.
Out.
The first tubing trip of the year was yesterday. Every year, my fraternity takes a few trips to the Wayne's World tubing place on the Bogue Chitto river. We load up ourselves, some food, and 2 kegs on tubes and float down the river for a relaxing 4-5 hours of drunkeness.
Some notable events on the trip:
-Rob put sunscreen in a smiley face on his chest Billy Madison style. Hilarity ensued, picture to follow.
-When we stopped for food, the peanut butter and the jelly were separated onto 2 different beaches. As neither group was willing to travel to the other, one group had peanut butter sandwiches while the other had jelly sandwiches. I, being allergic to peanut butter, had beer.
-When we stopped next at the infamous rope swing, I kinda got trapped in the middle of another group of people. These people just happened to be prime examples of Louisiana trailer trash, and anyone who knows me knows that I hate trashy people. In the midst of being trashy, one of the sluts with them pushed my tube (and my head) into the river bank, covering me with mud. I kicked her tube back with my foot so that I could get out of the bank, and she went apeshit. I'm not sure of most of what she said, as I don't speak trailer/ebonics, but I got the idea she was pissed at me for kicking her. I politely explained that had she been paying attention she wouldn't have needed to get kicked. This made her even more mad, and I took this chance to make my exit back to among my own friends.
I had a kick ass time, but looking back at it, I probably shouldn't have gone. You see, I woke up yesterday feeling kinda crappy, but not too bad. However, due I assume to tubing, I woke up today sick as a mother fucker. My throat hurts so bad I can barely swallow and I have to blow my nose every 10 seconds. Ah, the sacrifices college students make to have fun.
LSU only won by one point, even though Oregon St. missed THREE (3) extra points. Seriously Pat, LSU is going to be good this year.
Tulane lost to MSU 28-7...our quarterback is worthless. Our young, untested DL, on the other hand, looked pretty spectacular until the second half.
I need to work on LSAT shit today, but I'm too out of it to do anything. Oh well.
Wicker Park is quite possibly the worst movie of all time. I spent the entire movie waiting for something to happen. Do not let the trailer fool you, there is nothing thrilling or dangerous about Wicker Park. About halfway through, the entire theater just started cracking jokes at the screen. Normally, this would piss me off, but considering the circumstances I may have been the one to start the jokes, haha. Anyways, it's bad.
Ken 'HARD' Jennings returns to Jeopardy today. I predict that he remains champion for the enitre season, rendering the yearly 'Tournament of Champions' obsolete, as he will be the sole champion. H.A.R.D.
Out.
Friday, August 06, 2004
The Untitled Pseudo Comeback Post
Well adoring fans, since the last time I blogged the MIGHTY RANGERS fell from their rightful spot in first place, and have since regained it. Some other stuff happened too, but obviously that was the most important.
As far as class goes, I have reached the point of completely not caring. I got another 100 on my second English paper. This means I only needed a 72 or better on my final paper to keep my A in the class. Let me tell you, the utter piece of shit I turned in for my final paper will be testing those limits. Not only was it a full half page shorter than the minimum requirement, it had absolutely no structure and was probably full of grammatical errors. I actually never read the book it was over. However, I fully expect to still get at least a B on it and take my A in the class. As bad as it is, I'm sure it will look genius when compared to the rest of the class' papers.
In Acting we had a performance last week, which I of course was brilliant in and got another 100. This week we had to perform a monologue. I only got a 96, the instructor said I needed to improve my hand gestures. Stupid community theatre whore, she wouldn't know true emotion if it slapped her in the face. Our final is on Tuesday, and I only need to make a 45 to get an A in the class. Ha.
This past weekend I went to Atlanta for Tiffany's sister's wedding. They asked me to be an Usher, which was pretty cool and I was honored to do. I really like Amanda and Levi (the couple), so it was a good time. Levi's uncle owns a cattle farm, so for the rehearsal dinner we had all the steak we could eat, that had been butchered only the day before. It was fucking amazing. The wedding was very nice and all that good stuff. I tried to pay another usher 10 bucks to object, but he wouldn't do it...pussy. After the service, the reception was pretty sweet. In lieu of drinking too much (since I knew I'd be doing plenty of that later), I decided to instead impress all of Tiff's family friends and cut some hella rug on the dance floor. My versions of YMCA and 'The Train' will now inspire wedding reception dancing for years to come. However, fear not that I was sober, as I was very much so into the wine by the time the end roled around. After the reception we headed to Amanda and Levi's house where we threw a huge ass party and everyone got totally shit housed. The last thing I remember was chugging vodka, and then I woke up in the bed the next morning with Tiffany. It was badass. I am the master of the wedding afterparty.
I have been slacking lately in my LSAT preparation. Jared upped the ante in our competition the other day though, by making a 178 on his latest prep test. Bastard. Whatever, both of us will be scoring 175+ consistently by test day, I'm sure.
The MIGHTY RANGERS just completed a sweep of the Tigers yesterday. Today we will begin a sweep of the pitiful Baltimore Orioles.
The MIGHTY MAVS have made some solid acquisitions lately. I'm particularly excited about the additions of Calvin Booth and Jason Terry. I don't care what you think, the MIGHTY MAVS will be completely unstopable this year.
Arlington (my hometown) may get the new Cowboys stadium if the city will pony up the dough. Personally, I don't care if the plan is financially sound or not, I just want another reason to say that Arlington is better than Dallas. However, I would like to the see the Cowboys name changed to the Arlington Cowboys. I'm not going to comment extensively on the Quincy Carter issue, other than I fully support the move. Big Bill is God and King of all things football, so what he says goes.
Sorry this post was so delayed. I am now a complete and utter bum. Maybe if you are lucky updates will be more regular through the end of summer. I'm sure they will pick up again once school starts, as I will have infinitely more things going on.
Out.
As far as class goes, I have reached the point of completely not caring. I got another 100 on my second English paper. This means I only needed a 72 or better on my final paper to keep my A in the class. Let me tell you, the utter piece of shit I turned in for my final paper will be testing those limits. Not only was it a full half page shorter than the minimum requirement, it had absolutely no structure and was probably full of grammatical errors. I actually never read the book it was over. However, I fully expect to still get at least a B on it and take my A in the class. As bad as it is, I'm sure it will look genius when compared to the rest of the class' papers.
In Acting we had a performance last week, which I of course was brilliant in and got another 100. This week we had to perform a monologue. I only got a 96, the instructor said I needed to improve my hand gestures. Stupid community theatre whore, she wouldn't know true emotion if it slapped her in the face. Our final is on Tuesday, and I only need to make a 45 to get an A in the class. Ha.
This past weekend I went to Atlanta for Tiffany's sister's wedding. They asked me to be an Usher, which was pretty cool and I was honored to do. I really like Amanda and Levi (the couple), so it was a good time. Levi's uncle owns a cattle farm, so for the rehearsal dinner we had all the steak we could eat, that had been butchered only the day before. It was fucking amazing. The wedding was very nice and all that good stuff. I tried to pay another usher 10 bucks to object, but he wouldn't do it...pussy. After the service, the reception was pretty sweet. In lieu of drinking too much (since I knew I'd be doing plenty of that later), I decided to instead impress all of Tiff's family friends and cut some hella rug on the dance floor. My versions of YMCA and 'The Train' will now inspire wedding reception dancing for years to come. However, fear not that I was sober, as I was very much so into the wine by the time the end roled around. After the reception we headed to Amanda and Levi's house where we threw a huge ass party and everyone got totally shit housed. The last thing I remember was chugging vodka, and then I woke up in the bed the next morning with Tiffany. It was badass. I am the master of the wedding afterparty.
I have been slacking lately in my LSAT preparation. Jared upped the ante in our competition the other day though, by making a 178 on his latest prep test. Bastard. Whatever, both of us will be scoring 175+ consistently by test day, I'm sure.
The MIGHTY RANGERS just completed a sweep of the Tigers yesterday. Today we will begin a sweep of the pitiful Baltimore Orioles.
The MIGHTY MAVS have made some solid acquisitions lately. I'm particularly excited about the additions of Calvin Booth and Jason Terry. I don't care what you think, the MIGHTY MAVS will be completely unstopable this year.
Arlington (my hometown) may get the new Cowboys stadium if the city will pony up the dough. Personally, I don't care if the plan is financially sound or not, I just want another reason to say that Arlington is better than Dallas. However, I would like to the see the Cowboys name changed to the Arlington Cowboys. I'm not going to comment extensively on the Quincy Carter issue, other than I fully support the move. Big Bill is God and King of all things football, so what he says goes.
Sorry this post was so delayed. I am now a complete and utter bum. Maybe if you are lucky updates will be more regular through the end of summer. I'm sure they will pick up again once school starts, as I will have infinitely more things going on.
Out.
Monday, July 26, 2004
Kwitcherbichin
You people make me sick. You complain that all my posts are the same, but then when I wait until I have enough to say, I get bombarded with complaints that I haven't updated. Well guess what, you'll get updates when I give them, and you will like it, bitches!
Anyways, a lot has happened since last Thursday, so I suppose I will give a recap beginning Friday.
Friday: I did absolutely nothing all day and it was amazing. Friday night me and Jared went to see Spiderman 2 which was pretty badass, though not the gift from above it was made out to be.
Saturday: Saturday morning I was supposed to wake up and take a practice LSAT with Jared. Of course, I left my phone on silent from the movie, so when he called to wake me up, I didn't hear the phone. However, since Jared is H.A.R.D. he just drove over to my house, walked in and dragged my sorry ass out of bed. I got a 168, which is strangely low for me. I'm chalking it up to statistical anomaly since I did so much worse than I ever have before on Logical Reasoning. Whatever. Anyways, after that we decided we had done enough work and got drunk while swimming over at his place. After I finished shedding my pasty whiteness in favor of a more eye-pleasing tan, his parents decided to take us to eat at this kick ass mexican food place. Following dinner, we came home, drank some more, and got a little poker game together. I didn't win, but whatever, it was nice to play poker somewhere other than online for once this summer.
Sunday: Woke up late, which was excellent. The big event of the day was an online poker tournament I played in the afternoon. Out of a starting pool of 1269 entrants, I finished in 6TH PLACE! I won 49 bucks, which doesn't sound like much unless you consider the buy in was only a buck. That was sweet, but after that I once again did nothing the rest of the evening.
Today: Ah yes, now we come to today's activities. I was late to class this morning, and OF COURSE we had a quiz that I missed. My English professor loves me though and let me take it at the break. We also got our first papers back, and I got an A+, unsurprisingly. Seriously, all I had to do was bang on the keyboard for 20 min and I would have written a better paper than the morons in my class. Even the people who I don't think are complete retards were complainging about their grades on the paper, which I think speaks volumes about UTA. Anyways, I am the master of that class, I rule it with an iron fist. Acting sucked today, we're just rehearsing for the scene I have to perform on Wed. Should be an easy 100.
The book we're reading right now in English is Song of Solomon, by Toni Morrison. I'm sorry, but I HATE reading racially charged books in class, it's just asking for problems. Plus, Oprah is obsessed with Toni Morrison, and this book among others of hers have all been on Oprah's book club. And I HATE Oprah. The only thing it has going for it is that she won the Nobel Prize in Literature, but I think she only won it because shes black, a woman, and writes about racism in her books. She certainly isn't a talented writer. Oh well, it will be funny when the two old guys say something incredibly dumb and racist about the book and the 10 black people in my class jump them. That will make the whole thing worth it.
To sum up my points about UTA for the summer so far. I have a 2.9 GPA at Tulane. I have a 4.0 at UTA, and I also have the highest grade in both of my classes at the moment. This is solid proof that UTA is not a real school.
Questions? Comments? At least leave them here so I can feel special about people leaving me comments, damnit!
Out.
Anyways, a lot has happened since last Thursday, so I suppose I will give a recap beginning Friday.
Friday: I did absolutely nothing all day and it was amazing. Friday night me and Jared went to see Spiderman 2 which was pretty badass, though not the gift from above it was made out to be.
Saturday: Saturday morning I was supposed to wake up and take a practice LSAT with Jared. Of course, I left my phone on silent from the movie, so when he called to wake me up, I didn't hear the phone. However, since Jared is H.A.R.D. he just drove over to my house, walked in and dragged my sorry ass out of bed. I got a 168, which is strangely low for me. I'm chalking it up to statistical anomaly since I did so much worse than I ever have before on Logical Reasoning. Whatever. Anyways, after that we decided we had done enough work and got drunk while swimming over at his place. After I finished shedding my pasty whiteness in favor of a more eye-pleasing tan, his parents decided to take us to eat at this kick ass mexican food place. Following dinner, we came home, drank some more, and got a little poker game together. I didn't win, but whatever, it was nice to play poker somewhere other than online for once this summer.
Sunday: Woke up late, which was excellent. The big event of the day was an online poker tournament I played in the afternoon. Out of a starting pool of 1269 entrants, I finished in 6TH PLACE! I won 49 bucks, which doesn't sound like much unless you consider the buy in was only a buck. That was sweet, but after that I once again did nothing the rest of the evening.
Today: Ah yes, now we come to today's activities. I was late to class this morning, and OF COURSE we had a quiz that I missed. My English professor loves me though and let me take it at the break. We also got our first papers back, and I got an A+, unsurprisingly. Seriously, all I had to do was bang on the keyboard for 20 min and I would have written a better paper than the morons in my class. Even the people who I don't think are complete retards were complainging about their grades on the paper, which I think speaks volumes about UTA. Anyways, I am the master of that class, I rule it with an iron fist. Acting sucked today, we're just rehearsing for the scene I have to perform on Wed. Should be an easy 100.
The book we're reading right now in English is Song of Solomon, by Toni Morrison. I'm sorry, but I HATE reading racially charged books in class, it's just asking for problems. Plus, Oprah is obsessed with Toni Morrison, and this book among others of hers have all been on Oprah's book club. And I HATE Oprah. The only thing it has going for it is that she won the Nobel Prize in Literature, but I think she only won it because shes black, a woman, and writes about racism in her books. She certainly isn't a talented writer. Oh well, it will be funny when the two old guys say something incredibly dumb and racist about the book and the 10 black people in my class jump them. That will make the whole thing worth it.
To sum up my points about UTA for the summer so far. I have a 2.9 GPA at Tulane. I have a 4.0 at UTA, and I also have the highest grade in both of my classes at the moment. This is solid proof that UTA is not a real school.
Questions? Comments? At least leave them here so I can feel special about people leaving me comments, damnit!
Out.
Thursday, July 22, 2004
I am a phenomenon.
Christ people, my updates are like crack for some of you. I've had so many IMs in the past two days from people I haven't talked to in forever asking why I haven't updated in a couple days. I just want to say, why the fuck are you reading my blog but not taking to the time to brighten my boring summer by engaging me in conversation from time to time? Whatever, it makes me feel special to have so many loyal readers.
The lack of update has mostly been from lack of news. My English class is still as bad as ever. Old Guy 2 (the repeat as a question guy) has backed off a bit though. I think it's because the professor has stopped acknowledging his presence, haha. Old Guy 1 just doesn't get it though. Why won't he just shut the hell up? Noone gives a shit about how such in such in this story relates to such and such time when you were in pharmaceutical sales, blah blah blah. All I hear is this: "I'm a loser like the loser in this story because I was a loser and never went to college and got a loser job and now I'm a loser Old Guy in class with kids 30 years my junior who are more intelligent than I can ever hope to be."
Or something like that.
I think the university system in America today is totally worthless. I'm sorry, but there are just some people who shouldn't go to college. In fact, the vast majority of people have no true need to go to college. The new idea that everyone is entitled to a college education is total shit. Think about it, maybe (and I'm being generous), MAYBE 5% of jobs in the country truly need a college degreed person in that role. The rest of them are learned on the job anyways. The result of having tons of people in college is that more and more jobs can require a college degree just because everyone has one. Schools like UTA have no reason for existence.
Anyways...I had a scene performance in Acting yesterdat that I ROCKED, because I am that damn good. I have the highest average in the class so far, and I'm one of the few non Theater majors in the class. UTA morons strike again! Acting is a fun class though, better than like, History of Latin America or something.
No class tomorrow, I plan on sleeping in as late as possible. I played in a poker tournament tonight, finished 10th of 758 or so. Only won 45 bucks, but whatever, it was fun.
Keep the comments coming. I'm out.
The lack of update has mostly been from lack of news. My English class is still as bad as ever. Old Guy 2 (the repeat as a question guy) has backed off a bit though. I think it's because the professor has stopped acknowledging his presence, haha. Old Guy 1 just doesn't get it though. Why won't he just shut the hell up? Noone gives a shit about how such in such in this story relates to such and such time when you were in pharmaceutical sales, blah blah blah. All I hear is this: "I'm a loser like the loser in this story because I was a loser and never went to college and got a loser job and now I'm a loser Old Guy in class with kids 30 years my junior who are more intelligent than I can ever hope to be."
Or something like that.
I think the university system in America today is totally worthless. I'm sorry, but there are just some people who shouldn't go to college. In fact, the vast majority of people have no true need to go to college. The new idea that everyone is entitled to a college education is total shit. Think about it, maybe (and I'm being generous), MAYBE 5% of jobs in the country truly need a college degreed person in that role. The rest of them are learned on the job anyways. The result of having tons of people in college is that more and more jobs can require a college degree just because everyone has one. Schools like UTA have no reason for existence.
Anyways...I had a scene performance in Acting yesterdat that I ROCKED, because I am that damn good. I have the highest average in the class so far, and I'm one of the few non Theater majors in the class. UTA morons strike again! Acting is a fun class though, better than like, History of Latin America or something.
No class tomorrow, I plan on sleeping in as late as possible. I played in a poker tournament tonight, finished 10th of 758 or so. Only won 45 bucks, but whatever, it was fun.
Keep the comments coming. I'm out.
Monday, July 19, 2004
Domino Effect
My English class has become a domino effect of stupidity. Since the two old guys have been egregiously moronic since the first day without any evident repercussions, other morons in my class have decided they should annoy the shit out of me as well. FUCK YOU UTA, YOUR MORONIC SUB-HUMAN STUDENT BODY RUINS ALL OF MY GODDAMN SUMMERS!
Yeah, so I was all excited after last night because the MIGHTY RANGERS came back from 0-5 to beat the pussy ass Toronto Pink Jays 7-5, clinched by Teixiera's grand slam in the 8th. After completing the sweep of Toronto, I was all ready to beat the shit out of the White Sox for the next 3 days. But, of course, we decide (in a UTA educated fashion) to start fucking Benoit, the biggest fuck up of all time. He is second only to Chan Ho Park at the moment on my most hated Rangers list. Why have we not sent him back to AAA yet? Come on. Anyways, we were demolished. Whatever, we'll set those fuckers straight tomorrow night.
I just had to write a 2 page SINGLE SPACED paper for Acting class. First off, what the fuck kind of acting class has a paper? Second off, what kind of fucking college class has SINGLE spaced papers? Ridiculous.
On a happy note, I made an easy 150 bucks this weekend doing bullshit work for my Dad. Hells yeah.
I still am behind on movie going. I suck.
Out.
Yeah, so I was all excited after last night because the MIGHTY RANGERS came back from 0-5 to beat the pussy ass Toronto Pink Jays 7-5, clinched by Teixiera's grand slam in the 8th. After completing the sweep of Toronto, I was all ready to beat the shit out of the White Sox for the next 3 days. But, of course, we decide (in a UTA educated fashion) to start fucking Benoit, the biggest fuck up of all time. He is second only to Chan Ho Park at the moment on my most hated Rangers list. Why have we not sent him back to AAA yet? Come on. Anyways, we were demolished. Whatever, we'll set those fuckers straight tomorrow night.
I just had to write a 2 page SINGLE SPACED paper for Acting class. First off, what the fuck kind of acting class has a paper? Second off, what kind of fucking college class has SINGLE spaced papers? Ridiculous.
On a happy note, I made an easy 150 bucks this weekend doing bullshit work for my Dad. Hells yeah.
I still am behind on movie going. I suck.
Out.
Friday, July 16, 2004
The Schwab Owns You
Ah Fridays, how I love thee. Sleeping in 'til 1:30 pm was amazing. Then my Mom woke me up. Oh well, she took me to lunch, which was nice.
After lunch I spent the afternoon moving furniture for my Mom. She is having her entire house painted and all the tile redone. I'm not sure why exactly, but I just do as I'm told. After doing that for a bit, I took some weed killer and went on a killing spree in the flowerbeds. I am their Reaper, sending all those fuckers straight to hell. Fear me, dirty weeds.
I'm playing in a free poker tournament tonight, where the winner takes home $1,375!! Hell yeah! I don't really even care about winning, although it would be nice. The fun in poker is in the strategy and skill required to play well. People who don't play can't ever understand that, but it's true. If you read this, send a little thought of pocket Aces my way.
The next time any of you talk to me, please encourage me to be less of a bum. I haven't been doing jack shit all summer. I need to catch up on my reading and movie going. My laziness this summer has been fairly unacceptable.
Back in New Orleans in just over a month, can't wait to get back to the grind. Short post today, sorry if you expected more, bitch.
Out.
After lunch I spent the afternoon moving furniture for my Mom. She is having her entire house painted and all the tile redone. I'm not sure why exactly, but I just do as I'm told. After doing that for a bit, I took some weed killer and went on a killing spree in the flowerbeds. I am their Reaper, sending all those fuckers straight to hell. Fear me, dirty weeds.
I'm playing in a free poker tournament tonight, where the winner takes home $1,375!! Hell yeah! I don't really even care about winning, although it would be nice. The fun in poker is in the strategy and skill required to play well. People who don't play can't ever understand that, but it's true. If you read this, send a little thought of pocket Aces my way.
The next time any of you talk to me, please encourage me to be less of a bum. I haven't been doing jack shit all summer. I need to catch up on my reading and movie going. My laziness this summer has been fairly unacceptable.
Back in New Orleans in just over a month, can't wait to get back to the grind. Short post today, sorry if you expected more, bitch.
Out.
